You’re Engaged! Now What? 10 Thoughtful Steps to Take After Saying “Yes!”
Let me be the first to say, CONGRATULATIONS! Whether it was an intimate moment or a grand surprise, you’re engaged, and that deserves to be celebrated to the fullest. Before the beautifully chaotic period of wedding planning begins, take this time to soak it in, enjoy it, and be present!
However, if you’re already in the relishing stage of your engagement and are more ready to get your feet wet in the wedding planning process, here are 10 things I encourage all my couples to do once they’ve said “yes.”
I hope that this thoughtfully curated list provides you with some clarity in the beginning stages of planning with practical & easy steps to follow as we go along in this new journey!
1. Enjoy your engagement
Seriously, soak it all in. Pop the champagne, take a thousand photos of your ring, and bask in this special new stage of your relationship. Before you dive into the planning, give yourself permission to just be. This season is special, and it’s worth slowing down to savor the excitement before the logistics start rolling in.
2. Decide on your overall guest count
You don’t need a final guest list yet, but get clear on your ballpark number. Guest count is one of the biggest factors that influences your venue options, catering costs, and overall budget. Are you envisioning an intimate celebration with 60 guests or a full-blown party with 200? Start here as it will be your guiding light in many of your decisions.
3. Choose your location
City or countryside? Destination or hometown? Deciding on the general location early will inform many other decisions, such as the size of your guest list, the venue options you have available, the overall vibe & aesthetic you are looking to have and many more decisions.
In addition, having a general idea on the location will help figure out early the percentage of folks who are likely attending. For example, if the wedding will be destination and most people are traveling, about 30% - 40% of guests RSVP no. This can help you inform how many folks you should invite vs. how many will likely attend.
If you’re not sure yet, think about what kind of setting feels most “you” and if you need help weighing the options, a wedding planning (hi!) can help you make those decisions.
4. Talk & set the budget
Now’s the time to get real about finances. What are you two comfortable spending? Are parents or family members planning to contribute? If so, what will that look like? These conversations may feel awkward, but setting clear expectations early on prevents surprises down the road. Be mindful, be honest, and remember: your budget doesn’t define your wedding’s worth.
5. Align on your vision & set priorities
Before you get swept away in Pinterest boards, sit down together and talk about the kind of wedding you both want. What matters most to you? A killer band? A stunning location? A great dinner party with your closest friends? Knowing your shared priorities helps you stay grounded when decisions get overwhelming.
6. Select your dream wedding season
Even if you’re not ready to book a venue yet, identifying your ideal month or season helps guide everything else, especially vendor availability and pricing. Flexibility here can be a huge advantage, especially in high-demand areas like DC. Having a few target dates or weekends in mind gives you a better chance of securing your dream venue and team.
Also, if you decide you’re not too picky about the season, getting married in the off-season could also save you a percentage on your overall costs. If you’re looking at a wedding in DC, off-season would be January, February, most of March, July, most of August, and December (non-holiday dates)!
7. Secure your venue
Here’s the truth: you don’t really have a wedding date until your venue is booked. Your venue often determines your official date, sets the tone for the planning process, and impacts nearly every other vendor and design decision. Once you’ve narrowed down your guest count, location, budget, and season, start touring venues early—especially if you’re eyeing a popular space.
8. Start building your vendor team—beginning with a planner
Your planner should be one of the very first people you bring on board. (And no, I’m not just saying that!) A planner helps you avoid costly mistakes, stay organized, and connect with reputable vendors who fit your vision and budget. Once your planner is in place, focus on booking high-demand vendors like photographers, caterers, entertainment, and florals, those are the vendors that book out well in advance.
9. Communicate early with family
Weddings can bring up all kinds of emotions, both positive & sometimes negative ones. If you anticipate any difficult family dynamics, expectations, or cultural traditions that may shape your planning, it’s best to address them early. Clear communication, and setting boundaries when needed, goes a long way in keeping the process smooth for everyone involved.
At Velada we focus on ensuring that you feel supported throughout the process, and if that means helping you set boundaries, we WILL be there for you!
10. Remember what this is really about
The celebration is important and an incredibly special time in your life, but your relationship is everything. This is about the life you’re building together. Keep making time for each other outside of planning, date nights, quiet mornings, and conversations that have nothing to do with florals or floor plans. Your connection is the reason for all of this and it is the depth of that connection that inspires us to gather and celebrate you both.
At Velada Events, we believe in intentional & meaningful celebrations, and the process of getting there starts long before your wedding day is here. I hope this guide is helpful in narrowing down the first few tasks in the planning process. Never forget my #1 piece of advice, which is to take things one step at a time. Making premature decisions could lead to mistakes, loss of funds, and other resources; believe me, it’s crucial!
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure where to begin, I’m always here to help you turn your vision into a meaningful, stress-free planning journey.
You’ve got this—and I can’t wait to cheer you on.
- Geraldine
Pictures by: Rose Trade Co, Angela M Photography, Megan Dix Photography, Amative Creative
